Friday, May 27, 2005

The room is really dark and cold. Right now i am gona pamper my eyes for a moment by switching them back on.. i am supposed to be asleep, but i simply couldn't shut down my brain. Poor fried brain, with a troubling mind. to cut short the crap, i am having a headache right now.. didn't even now when it started..

I went down to see the games today.. just equally interesting as i expected. One team got to acclaim victory while the losing side will simply decried their defeat.. either way, it's just an exchange of experience and people move on to the next phase? Yup. so much so..

Somehow i am still confused by myself.. I am quite torn in between loving a person and the idea of letting go..i am confuse by the ambivalence of my feelings. I am not there always because i am free.. i am there becauase i am not freed.. freed from.. hmm nvm i guess my greatest adversary is myself. I can't stop fighting and have to continue on struggling.. On one side, i am slowing letting the line out, on the other side i slowly and carefully pulling it back, quite similar to how a kite is being flown.. why don't just let the line snap n see the beatiful kite fly in the sky for just that moment.. why not??? her perky manner is quite puzzling too.. haha she's feeling down for the moment maybe because of her match. She couldn't sleep for e moment too. Meanwhile there's a troubled soul over here too. It's been nearly a yr that i have really been into this relationship with her as a friend, closer friend, or whatever. I am certain that things will come to change in a month time.. Soon enough.

Back to myself, when will ever the university give me a reply with regard to my appeal. Can them be kind enough to do it soon, or maybe Now? that's me, i like speed. Well, at least after this is being settled, i will have a piece of peace with my mind. Yup then i will just have to wait for time to pass and get myself moving to e finals of the education system.. Definately not the finale man.. I know it wouldn't be.. it wouldn't be just earning $ too. It wouldn't be just big car, big mansion, big name.. It will be just something i always wanted to embrace with.. something or maybe a whole package of goodies.

Anyway middle east seems really to be a nice place.. it's no wonder the PM went there for a trip and that tv shows and tour agency are fanatically promoting the new place of interest and "interests". Yup.. UAE seems grand with great building, the Big Sail seems cool.. i wanna get one up in the future too. How abt a J-like building, i am just dreaming. But the opportunity of going there to work sound pretty attractive ( when it come? ) While most people is hooked up with the idea of working in US, i will choose UAE.. simply amazing. It's filled with a total mix of western and easten muslim culture.

Yup so much of crap, say bye to my headache. I am just gonna smile n sleep now.

jjia leaving skool at 1:18 AM

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